Aug 1, 2009

4 Shoes and a Wedding

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in , ,

One of the cons of having a puppy is that my shoes always goes missing. And when it finally does reappear, it always comes back to me looking like it went through a mine field or something. No points for guessing what my beloved Sasha did to my shoe.

Perhaps it’s time I get one those shoe tree, something high to place my shoes where it’s out of Sasha’s biting and jumping range.

When your shoe is bitten beyond recognition, you got no other choice but to get a new pair. Shoe shopping is something I’d try to avoid as much as possible. It’s not that I’m hopeless when it comes to buying shoes. I don’t need a guide when it comes to buying shoes. When you have enough gay friends, it’s very unlikely that you’ll end up buying an ugly pair of shoes.

It’s just that, I don’t have the attention span to look for the pair that I really, really like. I’d browse along the aisle - sneakers, golf shoes, running shoes and good God, bike shoes! - before realizing that I’m looking for shoes in the wrong place to begin with.

Yes, I am quite the mindless shoe shopper. It usually takes an extraordinarily looking pair of shoes (or in most cases, stilettos)to catch my eye. And of all the shoes that has ever caught my eye (and eventually my wallet), never did it occur to me that a pair of wedding shoes would make me go “ooooh! I gotta have that shoe!”

And somewhere in the back of my head I can almost hear the wedding bells ringing…

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Apr 24, 2009

Good Things Comes in a Box

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in , , , , ,

I have a team of fantastic suppliers (sound & lights, printing, construction, etc). Being in the events industry, who you work with can either make or break your event. I treat my suppliers like as if they were my extended family. We've worked together for so many years that there's a level of trust where I don't have to keep a close eye on them to check if they're doing a good job or not.

I think that what also makes our working relationship go so well is partly because I don't squeeze my supplier for every single penny. Some people love to "milk" their suppliers dry with that lame excuse of "sorry, we don't have the budget so you need to give me discount". For as long as the price is reasonable, I will never ask my supplier to reduce his price. You know what they say, "if you pay peanuts, you get monkeys". And I don't do monkeys.

My relationship with my sound & light supplier goes beyond work (and I don't mean that in a scandalous kinda way). Uncle J (as I fondly call him) and I (his beloved niece as he fondly calls me) could spend hours on the phone chatting about the most ridiculous things (from politics to gossips to me blaming him for the hot weather), he would often treat me and my partner to free lunch and when there's a special occasion (like Christmas or birthdays) he'd give presents, birds nest or ang pows.

But this present he recently gave me really took me by surprise.





A brand new Portable DVD player.






It comes with a 7" screen and it's so small and light that I can bring it anywhere I want (this will definitely come in handy for future road trips. It can even be charged in the car!).




And the best thing about this Portable DVD player is that it can also play stuff from the USB drive.


So just imagine all the stuff that I don't have to burn onto a disc. I could just download my favorite shows like The Tudors onto my external drive and watch it on this player.

And yes, it can be connected to the tv should I feel like watching my stuff on the big screen.

I think Christmas came a bit too early for me this year :D

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Apr 13, 2009

Clash of the Ego

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in , , ,

It is a universal fact that couples enjoy doing things together. Some couples wear matching outfits, some have matching hairdo (I swear, one of my gfs had a mullet haircut once just so she could match her bf's hairdo), some couples sit facing each other at Starbucks but engrossed in their own laptops.... so yeah, you get the drift.

McChef is no exception to this rule. He loves getting involved in the things I do because to him, it's the same as doing things together. Though I find this behavior of his rather endearing, there are some times when I feel that he's verging on hovering and just plain being a busybody.

Case in point - when I blog, he loves to read over my shoulder and tells me how to write (oh the nerve!). Or when I practice my guitar playing, he'll be like this vulture and waits til I put down my guitar. He would then pick my guitar up and "plays" like he's some guitar hero god. *sigh* The things I have to put up with sometimes.

Anyway, as you are aware, I've recently picked up paper crafting as a hobby, which I'm turning into a business. While I was making a card for Twilight Zone, McChef was (no surprise here) hovering near my work table, snooping around checking out what I was doing.

Since I was concentrating on my work, I couldn't be bothered with what exactly he was doing. When I first looked up, he was sketching something (using my sketch book nonetheless!).

The next time I looked up, he was cutting some of my materials and assembling them on the floor.

Nose-deep in my craft, he then shoved his first handmade item in front of me. And to be honest, I was jealous. My first creation was 2 flowers in a vase. His was a cool skull head which he named El Poco Loco, that loves to eat tacos and smoke a certain plant.

This is El Poco Loco, who taunts me by asking "Hoo's the cutest?"


He even wears a sembrero with a pink feather attached to it. He loves tacos (that thing near the right cheek)


El Poco Loco smokes and eats at the same time, which has made his teeth crooked


I don't deny that McChef is the more creative and artsy one between the two of us, but I think that life is a bit unfair to me. Between the two of us, he's the better looking one, he's better at business ventures and he can cook. As for my talent, well let's see... selective memory (read: forgetful), selective hearing (read: short attention span) and able to entertain others with my acrobatic skills (read: clumsy). Isn't it "great" to be me?

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Mar 8, 2009

This Week's Associated Content

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in ,

Do check out my latest article on Associated Content below, which was inspired by the wife of a good friend of mine.


Dealing with Your Good Friend's Spouse
You're having a hard time getting along with your good friend's spouse, who's proving to be quite a pain in the neck. Here's how to keep your interaction with the "spouse from hell" as civilized as possible.
http://www.associatedcontent.comarticle/1527851/dealing_with_your_good_friends_spouse.html

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Feb 18, 2009

The Unconventional Boyfriend

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in ,

I had decided against writing about my 3-year anniversary with McChef on the actual day itself (which was 1st February, btw). I had also refrained myself from writing a Valentine's Day post regarding our relationship.

At the time, I wasn't inspired to write about V-day or our anniversary. What was there to write about our 3-year union? Granted, 3 years without a single breakup is quite an achievement for someone who's fickle minded when it comes to being in a relationship and for someone who gets bored easily (in case you're wondering, I'm the fickle-minded one, and he's the one who gets bored easily).

So I thought and pondered on what else was there to write about my beloved partner. Sure, he's thoughtful enough to give me flowers once in a while. We all know he cooks for me (hence the nickname "McChef", d'oh). He's also a romantic with a twisted sense of humor. Let's not even mention about the time he got me a yabby prawn as a pet (now, who in the right mind does this???).

Anyways, I thought it was high time I said something nice about my man (to make up for the fact that I DIDN'T get him anything for both our anniversary and V-day. I'm a terrible girlfriend, can't you tell? Traveling and attending weddings are expensive affairs, and when one has to do both many times in February, one becomes broke).

I'm not big on material stuff like jewelry or clothes (although a brand new MacBook would be nice *hint hint HINT*), which makes it a little bit tough to buy me gifts. Flowers are nice... for about 5 seconds before I decide that they're better off in the rubbish bin. Chocolates are sweet but shows that the giver lacks imagination. He did get me a spa voucher but that was as my Christmas gift, which I have yet to use. Thankfully, McChef is always thinking out of the box.

So as an anniversary gift, he got me a firework. Now, just how cool is that? I mean, how many of you have ever received a firework from your partner? Well, granted that fireworks are banned in this country. But still, I thought this was a pretty awesome gift. Definitely better than a yabby prawn, if you ask me.

When we first hooked up, he lit up some fireworks for me. He even let me light one up. I really love watching fireworks, so getting to light one up (and it was a pretty big one too), that was exhilarating! And not to mention how shit scared I was.





This baby can shoot 25 flowers into the sky. I didn't get to play it on our actual anniversary day when we were both in Kuching because it was raining every single damn night. So this baby will have to wait 'til my next trip home :)

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Jan 24, 2009

Open Letter to My Screaming Neighbor

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in ,

Dear Mrs. Screaming Housewife,

You may not know me apart from the fact that we may have crossed paths in our condo's elevator. I believe I live a few floors below your unit. I may not remember how you look like but I am almost ashamed to admit that I know you quite well.

I know that you work hard to earn a living. I also know you have a rotten man for a husband. He drinks a lot almost every night and this displeases you. It makes you upset because he spends your hard earned money to support his drinking, he comes home late and smelling like a #&@(#&#* (sorry, I couldn't catch that foul word you used).

I didn't mean to eavesdrop into your weekly arguments with your husband. But it's hard not to seeing how loud your voice is, especially at midnight.

I'm not trying to interfere with your life. I don't know you well enough to understand why you have such a loser for a husband. I mean, I'm cool if you dig idiots like him. But from woman to woman, I feel sorry for you. And I hate to feel sorry for weak other people.

I've been around drunk people before, so I know very well that they are the last people you want to talk logic with. So to save you from ruining your vocal cords screaming at that drunkard, here's some non-lethal ideas you could use to torture the guy:

1) Spray animal pheromones on his clothes and shoes. It'd be interesting to see what other animal would want to sleep with him apart from his slutty mistress. Or you could use octenol on his clothes. I heard that it attracts mosquitoes. Oh btw, isn't it dengue season now?


2) Instead of chucking the microwave out the window, perhaps you could throw money. By doing so, you are stopping yourself from "sponsoring" his night activities. And if you don't have money to give, maybe he'll stay home more. Or get a job. Or whatever. (Plus money doesn't destroy your neighbour's car ;) )

3) Switch his diet pills with estrogen pills. Wouldn't it be fun to compare whose boobs are bigger?


4) Instead of slamming doors at midnight, perhaps you could use a quieter approach, like cutting up his clothes. Or you could soak his clothes in the toilet bowl. How's that for cleaning his dirty laundry?


But lady, all the above suggestions don't offer permanent solutions. The best solution would be to kick that parasite out of the house and out of your life.

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Jan 21, 2009

Still Got the Blues For You?

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in , , ,

2009 is proving to be the year of weddings. I've got 6 weddings to attend from February to March. I'm more concerned about what I'll be wearing to each weddings coz I ain't gonna get caught wearing the same thing twice!





Anyways, here's a quiz for you guys.

If an ex-bf or an ex-fling or an ex-whatever-you-call-someone-who-used-to-be-important-to-you-but-not-so-much-anymore, invited you to attend their wedding, would you go?

I can pretty much guess the kind of responses I'll be getting.

So I'm going to narrow down the question a little bit further. Would you go if he was the guy-who-got-away? The one who once in a while still pops into your mind and makes you wonder,"Hmm... what if we had stayed together?"

I'm in a dilemma. Don't get me wrong. I'm more than happy that he's getting married. There was no bitterness when we ended. Though I'm not in love with him anymore, I still love him, get what I mean? But I'm not sure if I'm brave enough to go.

Just getting his invitation card gave me an emotional roller-coaster, so I can't imagine that it'll be any easier for me to watch him say his I-do's with another woman. And I'd really hate to be that girl who looks at the groom with those sad nostalgic eyes.




So should I or should I not go?

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Nov 8, 2008

When It Is OK to Hit Below the Belt

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in , , ,

I don't know what possessed me to write this. I was halfway writing about something else when I had the urge to write about a particular guy from my hell-raising days past.

I believe it was in 2001 when I had mistakenly took lust for love. I was with a girlfriend one day, doing regular girlfriend stuff in KLCC and decided to walk into the Kinokuniya bookstore.

Other than satisfying my weird obsession with being in bookstores/stationary shops, I wasn't looking for anything particular. But then, something... someone caught my eye.

Not to sound cliche, but really it was like how we watch in movies where the time kinda goes in slow-mo. There he was, standing in the music section, clad in khakis and polo t-shirt, the most good looking guy I have ever laid my eyes on. His looks was borderline on being pretty but somehow has managed to retain his machoism on that pretty face of his. His skin wasn't as porcelain white as most typical Japanese people are. He was kinda tanned, which scored huge in my books.

The above is NOT Japanese Boy, although they do have the same body type.



Without consciously knowing it, I was secretly hiding in between the bookshelves so I could have a better look at him. I grabbed my girlfriend's hand and excitedly squealed to her,"OMG, you have to check this guy out. He's so HOT!!!"

"Well, why don't you just say hi to him?", she replied to me and without warning, just grabbed my hand and dragged me to him.

Anyways, to cut the story short, turns out Japanese Boy is a friend of hers. So we were formally introduced, hung out more and eventually ended dating each other.

In many ways, Japanese Boy was a perfect bf - charming, unbelievably good looking, body nicely toned and tanned, filthy rich, well-mannered, and my friends loved him (and I believe there were days when they'd rather hang out with him than with me).

But he was always on the horny side, which didn't go down to well with me. No seriously, he was like a horny energizer bunny on speed. And I didn't want to go down that road with him because there was that gut feeling telling me something was not quite right with my prince charming.

The resemblance is very cunning...



So anyways, one fine day he tells me he needed to go back to Japan for a month to visit his grandma. In my heart I was like,"Aawwww, so sweet! He adores his grandma."

Ok fine, I was thinking more about the gifts he was going to buy for me from Japan.

While he was in Japan, his cousin (whom I've grown quite close to) and I was doing our usual drinking session when the conversation went something like this:

Cousin: I can't believe you let him go back to Japan.
Perky: I don't see why not.
Cousin: You're the coolest girlfriend.
Perky: What do you mean?
Cousin: He's there to be with his ex-girlfriend.

Cousin then proceeds to take a picture from his wallet of this girl who looked like a porn star.

.........





Let's just say my reaction to that was very unladylike. But I played my cool and got my girlfriends to play along with my little revenge. When Japanese Boy came back, he didn't know that I had already found out about his affair. Because he had all this money to spend (and he wasn't stingy with it), my girls and I took him for a shopping spree.

It was fun at first, trying to burn a hole in his wallet. But unless if I was buying an island, it was very unlikely that he was going to be anywhere near broke. So I confronted him. Basically, he said he loved me very much but he's a man with certain needs and when those needs aren't met, he went looking for it with someone who would give it to him (which was always the said ex gf).

Yeap.

So anyways, long story cut short. I broke up with him. He went back to Porn Star Gf, gotten her pregnant, married her and only to divorce her a couple years later.

He did try to get back together even while he was married to her, but let's just say, it's kinda hard for me to take a guy seriously when the continuation of his generation depends on the lipstick between his legs.

Would you play with a lipstick?




*Writer has ZERO respect for men who cheats on their woman and a -50 respect for women who knows and yet stays with their cheating partners.

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Sep 3, 2008

Perky is Going to be a Fairy Godmother

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in , , ,

Over the years I've seen a few of my girlfriends and cousins carrying their own bundle of joy. Yeah, there was that "a-ha" & "owwwwhh" moments for me when I dangle carry their baby. But none of that can compare to the overwhelming joy I felt when my bestfriend, *Sheep, told me that she was 3 months preggers.

Something hit me. I was getting all teary-eyed, jumping & screaming like as if it was me who just hit the RM1mil jackpot.

*Sheep and I have been friends since we were in primary school. So we go aaaallll the way back. When I got my first period, she was there. When she got her first boyfriend, I was there.

We were there for each other when we went through our bodily and hormonal changes, when we realized we needed glasses coz we were blind as a bat, our heartaches, our successes and failures. We went to tuition together, and skipped tuition together.

Coincidentally (or fate had something to do with it, whatever), we even went to the same university (and had many, many more crazy adventures together). Every journey a girl could go through, we were always there for each other. Even as we go through our careers, she's not too far away as she works for my dad as the outlet manager for his pharmacy store.

So when she told me about this wonderful news, I kept trying to imagine how she'll look like pregnant. As she's in Sarawak and I'm here in KL, I won't deny that I was slightly upset that I was going to miss out on watching her "grow". I was going to miss out on feeling her baby kick in her tummy. I was also going to miss out on tagging along with her as she goes shopping for maternity clothes or when she needs to go out and indulge her cravings.

I'll be missing out quite a lot actually, and there's not much I can do about that.

For most parts, I can't be more thrilled about *Sheep's pregnancy. But a small part of me kept hearing "tick tock tick tock" and I found myself wondering if I'll ever get the chance to experience pregnancy myself. Which is really strange coz I don't like them drooling, shitting, crying monsters babies.

But for now, I'll just settle on being the coolest godmother to *Sheep's child.

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Jul 12, 2008

Get Your Groove On

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in , ,

I’ve been quite addicted to playing the Ultimate Flirting Championship by Extreme Style by VO5 lately. This flirting game is really fun and it also feels real too. As the game asks you to enter your date of birth, gender and name, I’ve tried this game with different personalities, character and style. When I play as a woman, I get to be the judge and pick my suitor based on the answers that the 2 men give me. Sometimes I even play as a man, so it then becomes my job to win the lady by beating my opponent with my “killer lines”. It's fun using different characters to play. I guess it’s my way of trying out which flirting style suits me best, minus the embarrassment of having to do it face-to-face ;)

Victory Hair to me is when another person is attracted to you and you guys are able to connect because there is good chemistry between the two of you. My idea of a successful Victory Hair is when a guy just comes up to me, introduces himself properly (no corny pick-up lines, please!) and for some reason we’d just have a blast with each other’s company. A good hearty laugh is all I need when I’m on a date :)

Anyways, do add the widget below on your site, get your friends to do the same and try out the Ultimate Flirting Championship by Extreme Style by VO5. Who knows, you might just meet one very charming woman who goes by the name Lady Laughsalot ;)




For more widgets please visit www.yourminis.com




Sponsored by Extreme Style by VO5

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Jul 9, 2008

Play the Game, But Don't Play the Player

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in , ,

I was at this club one night and I had to use the bathroom, which turned out to be a unisex bathroom. So anyways, I was at the basin washing my hands, when I noticed this guy standing next to me and just kept looking at me through the mirror.

So I gave him the “what’s up?” nod because I was getting a little bit uncomfortable with him just staring at me.

Then he said,”Do you want to know what it is that I see in this mirror right now? Us in the near future, dating *wink wink*”.

That was probably one of the worst pick-up lines I’ve ever heard, but it did give me a good laugh and we did ended up dating for quite a while.

I don’t know what possessed him to say such things, but if I had to guess, it would probably be because of my hair. I was sporting a Rachel hair-do (Jennifer Aniston’s character in Friends) back then and it swished and swooshed so perfectly with each step I took.

So, if you’re looking for hair products that will give you that Victory Hair, Extreme Style has just the answer for you. As a matter of fact, Extreme Style by VO5 is having the VO5 Ultimate Flirting Championship, where you can practise your pick-up lines and flirting skills online.



For more widgets please visit www.yourminis.com




Basically, this game is about outflirting your opponent. Do that and Victory Hair is yours for the taking! So try out your flirting skills by clicking the game above and who knows, you might actually be good enough to win the Victory Hair from Extreme Style by VO5.


Sponsored by Extreme Style by VO5

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Jul 6, 2008

Breaking Up Is Hard To Do.... Like, NOT!!!

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in ,

A while back, I posted this Spark opportunity in SocialSpark:

You can find this opp here.



For those of you who aren't on SocialSpark and have no idea what a Spark opp is, well, it's basically a free Opportunity that serve as ideas for blog posts. You know, sometimes when you hit a dry spell, you can always go to the Spark section & draw some inspiration there.

So yeah, anyways, I put up a Spark trying to get people to write about the most embarassing break-ups they've ever gone through and at the same time put a funny twist to it (so that instead of feeling depressed, we get to laugh about it). To be honest with you, I thought no one was up for the challenge. I mean, seriously, who wants to relive that painful moment in time and write it for the world to read?

Well, that is unless if you have a wicked sense of humor like Tough Girl 101 does. When I was notified that someone took my Spark, I was excited. And I was not disappointed at all after reading her post. It's so funny, I almost fell off my chair from laughing so hard!

So guys, if you wanna find out if things are bigger in Texas, do check out her post: Things AREN'T Bigger in Texas. You will definitely get a good laugh out of that one!

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Jul 5, 2008

Chubby Cheeks

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in ,

Lately McChef has been developing a habit of squeezing my face. He'd say things like,"Mmm... so fat this face!" *squeeze squeeze*

I mean, I don't mind to be called the f word. I find it as a compliment as I've been trying to put on weight over the past few years.

But still, this remark from McChef has made me wonder how come he doesn't say that I'm fat overall? Why mention only my face is fat? No, actually, just scrap that. Between being called a fat face and having my cheeks squeezed, I'm definitely more annoyed with the squeezing.

When I was a kid, my mom taught me never to allow people to pinch or squeeze my cheeks. She said that's how people get saggy cheeks. So naturally, I believe her. Coz she's my mom!! When it comes to my face, I will not risk doing anything that will make me end up looking like a bull dog!


(Pic courtesy of sonja71)



Damn it, now I've lost my trend of thought.

Oh yeah, back to McChef and the face squeezing.

I asked him why is he getting such a kick from squeezing my face lately. And he's reply was,

"Your face is so fat now. Squeezing it is like squeezing your butt"


HUH?????


My Face = My Butt???

So does that mean I have a BUTT FACE????



Seriously, I don't think this can pass as a compliment.

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Jun 16, 2008

The One That Got Away

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in ,

As we go through life, we'll meet lots of people and make mental notes of them. We'll always remember the ones with whom we shared special memories with (like the time when one of the gfs got stung by a jellyfish and how we all volunteered to piss on her to ease her pain - all in the name of friendship), or the one you first kissed, or the one you first loved, or the one you who always made you feel better.

But most of all, somehow or rather, we'll always remember the one that got away. Maybe we don't think about that person every single waking moment of every single day, but the thought of that person does pop up once in a while.

I think that the one that got away is someone who was very special to you, someone very close to your heart and everything was fantastic. Except the timing was just off. It was like as if you found this diamond in the rough, so to speak, but the stars or the planet wasn't lined up quite right in your universe.


I have that guy, the one that got away. He was the first guy I actually felt something real for. I met my one-that-got-away when I was in college. We didn't exactly start off great, but the dynamics of our friendship shifted at a pace I was comfortable with. Not too fast, not too slow. As time went by, I found myself making more mental notes of this guy - his sense of humor, the way he talked, the way he moved, how out of tune his singing was (which made me laugh even harder), how he doesn't take himself seriously, how he treated others, and how he was when he was with me.


Despite all those greatness, things didn't work out between us (well, obviously, since he is the one that got away). I suppose it was the timing of it all. Perhaps I was too slow in figuring out how my feelings were towards him. I had a lot of things going on at that point in time - I was away from home the first time, I broke up (again) with my high school bf, I was trying to adjust to the college life, etc.


A part of me wanted to just be swept away by his sweet gesture but a part of me was trying to keep things simple between us, well, simple for me at least. Yes, I wasn't ready for another relationship and it showed through the mix signals I was sending him.

Then one fine day he told me he's got someone new. I was overwhelmed with this sudden pain in my chest and how I tried really, really, really hard not to cry. And that was when I knew, how hard I had fallen for this guy and how things were never going to be the same between us.


It was quite strange because we never argued, never had misunderstandings, the chemistry between us was more than effing great but we both pulled away from each other because it was too much to deal with. He had a gf to attend to, while I had a broken heart to mend.

As time went by, after countless pity-me parties with the girls, after countless bad decisions in the guys I would date after my one-that-got-away, my heart finally healed itself. And one day I found myself ready.

Ready to settle down, ready to stick with my man through thick and thin. My current relationship, I believe, will be the one who I'll spend the rest of my life with. It'll work this time because I've finally made sense of things and I'm a different person now. I finally understand who I am, what I want and what I need from a partner.

But sometimes I do think about the one that got away. I wonder,"What if we were together now, with me as I am and not as I was?" Would it have worked? Would I be happier than I am now?


The one that got away is the biggest "what if?" question you'll have in your life. But considering the situation that I'm in (one foot down the wedding aisle with McChef), I'll just have to accept that my one-that-got-away is married to someone else and that he really is, well, the one that got away.
But thankfully, being the person that I am today, I've also realized that me wondering about the "what if's" is just a test of my commitment to McChef and I'll just shrug it off. But it's always nice to know that the memories I had with my one-that-got-away will most likely bring a smile to my face when I'm no longer "hip and happening".


Anyways, the real point that I'm trying to put across here is, if you have that person and it's not too late to act on it (such as you're both single), then seriously, do something about it. Ask him/her on a date, because who knows, you could very well be the person who got away for him/her. And who knows, now that the stars and the planets have lined themselves perfectly in both your universe, wouldn't it be great to be able to say to him/her, "Hey you, you're the one that almost got away".


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Jun 8, 2008

Pink is the Color of Passion!

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in

Check out what I got as a "housewarming" gift for my newly renovated toilet:





It's a PINK PIGGY MAT!!

I love it soooo much!! It's pink and it's a pig (and you all know how pig-obsessed I am). This mat was bought from Kedai Barang-Barang in 1Utama. At first, I was kinda hesitant to use it but after much consideration, it's better to use it rather than let it collect dust. Even then I always make sure that my feet is fairly clean before I step on them.


Only a best friend can think of such a thoughtful gift for me. So thank you Far East!!! XOXO!

Far East is one of a handful of people I consider my bestfriend. I don't usually let people into my inner circle very easily as I have issues with trusting people. Plus, it takes a while for me to warm up to a person. And if you've done or said something that just pissed me off the first time we meet, then it's pretty hard to get back into my good graces after that. So yeah, Far East is one of those rare breed of people that I warmed up to pretty easily.

I can't remember exactly when we started hanging out with each other or when we became close friends. I'm pretty sure he would know the details better than I do. One thing's for certain, we met through orchestra practise.

I believe that it was our passion for movies and food that brought us close. I'd skip class and have the urge to catch a movie and since he wasn't working at that point of time, he seemed to be the logical choice to bring along for movies. He was even dubbed "Gold Class" because he would only watch movies in the Gold class cinema.

I get bored after talking to most people after a while (which would explain the "disappearing" act from time to time) but Far East is one of those people who I can just talk to for hours and hours with no breaks in between. He talks quite a lot, too, for a guy. We'd talk about the nonsense stuff to the intimate stuff. He's pretty much like me in a sense that he doesn't discuss certain intimate topics with people, but when he finds the right friend (such as moi) no topic are off limits.

We share a lot of personal jokes, which draws a lot of "huh?" reaction from our friends. And we'd give each other a certain look and just burst out laughing coz we're the only ones who gets it. We'd often poke fun at how we're even best friends with each other. Whenever he mentions about his other bestie, I'd pout and say to him,"And I thought I was your bestfriend!" He'd always try to win me back by replying,"No no, this guy was from my school. And besides, you're different!"

And the best part of our friendship is that how feel we feel towards each other is mutual - I adore him just as much as he adores me. Well, at least I'd like to think so.


p/s: Far East is currently recuperating somewhere in a hospital right now. So let's all pray that he gets well soon, especially since our trip to Bangkok is only next month!



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May 25, 2008

Sorry Seems To Be the Hardest Word

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in

The other I was having dinner with a very good colleague of mine at One World Hotel. As I was stuffing my face with free food, I couldn't help but look at the family of 3 seated at the table directly in front of us.

Perhaps it had something to do with their daughter wearing this tiny mini skirt, showing off her lengthy slim legs.

Or perhaps it had something to do with the red wine on their table & how much I was wishing I could have a glass or two.

Anyways, after eavesdropping on their conversation for quite some time it turns out that they were there to celebrate the mother's birthday.

The dad then proceeded to give some sort of speech to his two leading ladies. Most of his speech was barely audible to me as I was busy eyeing the dessert spread in front of me.

Me Tarzan, you Jane. Hear me roar!!

But I could clearly him say this as he turned addressed this sentence to his wife:

"I'm sorry for whatever wrong I've done to you".



And that just melted my heart right away. It was like as if I was watching a real-life romantic movie. I went home thinking to myself,"How nice it would be if my partner and I would be that romantic when we're old & with a teenage kid in our life"? It can't be easy for a father to apologize for his wrongdoings especially in front of his child.

So I was excited to tell McChef about this thing I just witnessed and how much I wished that all men can be, well, man enough to say sorry.

McChef: Huh?? Why would he apologize if he didn't do anything wrong?

Perky: No, you just don't get it, do you? Sometimes, people do something that may hurt their loved ones unintentionally. So, he's being very thoughtful to his wife by apologizing for whatever hurt he may have caused her. Well, I think that's very sweet of him.

McChef: Well, you know what I think? I think he's having an affair.



Men. Straight men. Need I say more? *sigh*


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May 18, 2008

What Do I Get For The Man Who Already Has Me?

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in

McChef's birthday is just around the corner and I have yet to find any below RM20 gift I can buy for him crack my brains as to what presents I should get for him. I mean, as the title suggests, I thought that now that I've been suckered to spend the rest of my life with this man we're partners til death do us part, what more can he possibly want right?

I'm at a real disadvantage here. Not only am I forgetful and a big time procrastinator, but also I'm in my cheapskado season as I'm already spending a bomb for the renovation works on my bathroom as well as trying to save moolah for Queen's We Will Rock You Musical in Bangkok this coming July (yes, I'm going to watch the musical AGAIN).

Recently I've been getting an earful of complaints from McChef. Ever since I started working at my current company, I've been overloaded with so much work. I admit, my social life is in a state of coma now that I get off work much later than usual. So I'm tired and all I want to do is sleep, but if this goes on, I could very well kill my relationship with my man.

So, to make up for it, I'm going to buy my way out of it get a present that will solve his complaints.

Complaint #1: You Don't Wear Sexy Lingerie Anymore
To those who know the both of us in real life, you all know just how strict McChef is with how I dress in public. If he had it his way I'd be covered from head to toe. But behind closed doors, he loves it when I relive my good old skanky whore days wear sexy lingerie for him.

I'm very particular with the lingerie that I wear. There's no way in skanky hell that I will be caught dead wearing a lingerie that was sold at a RM10-for-3 store. I can live dressing up like Plain Jane, but my obsession with lingerie does not permit me to wear cheapskado ones.

These days I've stopped wearing lingerie. It's not because I don't like them anymore, it's just that it takes time and energy to put them on (only to have them taken off in 5 minutes). And when you do put them on, you must also remember that there are certain areas that you need to trim first coz you know, you don't wanna look like Scary Bush when you lift your arms (or your legs). So yeah, it's hard to look sexy when you're dead tired from work.

Did I mention I'm broke as well? So that means I can't buy lingerie from my fav store Blush! But I do have a solution. It shouldn't cost more than RM20, I think.

What in skank hell is this, you ask?

*

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Well, it's nipple petals. This should keep him amused for the next 3 days or so.


Complaint #2: You Don't Give Me Striptease Anymore
I strongly believe that every girl/sistah should give their partner a striptease once a week AT LEAST. You need to keep the spice up in your relationship. I mean, the guy's seen your entire body, so you need to change the way you present your body to him so that he'll stay entertained (otherwise he might not bother to come home or use the "go out for drinks with buddies" excuse just so he can score some chics start looking for "other" sorts of entertainment).

Now, I don't wanna brag but I gotta say I give the best striptease. Period. Sorry, I can't upload any videos for you to see, so you're just gonna take my word for it. Heck, I can even do the oompa loompa dance and it'll get him turned on in 3.3 seconds. The secret to doing a good striptease is CAWNFIDENCE.

We recently watched the movie Step Up 2 and there was this one scene where the girl was doing this (scroll forward to the 1m 47s scene):




I could tell how much he enjoyed watching that one particular scene as he kept watching it over and over and over again. So I will learn this move for him. Oh, this is so gonna keep his eyes on my bum-bum-bum-bum-bum and hopefully he can handle my gadong-a-dong-dong.


Complaint #3: You Don't Give Me Massages Anymore
McChef loves to be pampered like a girl massages. I don't blame him for being addicted to my massages.
But giving massages requires tonnes of energy, especially if you have small hands like I do. And he wants long massages. There have been times when I fell asleep giving him massages coz he keeps wanting more. Did I mention I have small hands?

Anyways, I've already come up with a solution for this one:

It's a massage hand tool and it doesn't cost a bomb. I could even buy these in pairs. This way I don't have to work my hands to massage him. I could just press this on his back. Oh, I'm such a genius!



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Mar 28, 2008

Oops, Sorry, I Didn't Mean to Eavesdrop

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in ,

Sorry for the long silence. From my previous post, you all kinda figured out that I was gonna be away on a long holiday (yes, the flu followed me on my vacation, then there was another thing called Urinary Tract Infection that followed suite, but that's a long story). After my long holiday I had to go to Penang for a job. And when I came back, my internet at home has been cut off (yes yes, I will try to pay my bills on time in the future so that I do not have to resort to blogging in the office).

Anyways, I was at the pantry today when I accidentally joined in overheard my colleagues talking to each other. The man was clearly complaining about his wife, while my other female colleague just stood there doing nothing while he talks cock about the weaknesses of the ENTIRE female population listened in silence.


I would've said something to him not only because of the way he portrayed his wife - an insecure, stupid, unworthy being - but also frankly, in my opinion, one should not talk about their spouses in such a negative manner.


Then the female colleague said this to him:

"Never criticize your wife for her shortcomings or insecurities or her weaknesses. Don't you ever forget that it was because of her shortcomings that she could not find a better husband than you."


I was deeply moved by her statement because now whenever McChef calls me a dumb dumb, I can actually say something smart to him. Hahaha.


Okay, jokes aside, I thought that was a brilliant thing to say whenever you wonder,"Why is she married to that cheating asshole? Oh yeah, coz she's stupid, she doesn't know any better."


Okay, okay, I was still joking when I made the previous remark (kalau ada orang kena sentap, oh who cares, sentap lah engkau!).


Anyways, I'll be revamping my blogsite soon, so hopefully I'll be able to unveil the new look sooner than later. Ciao!


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Jan 23, 2008

How to Wriggle Your Way Back Into Your Ex's Life

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in ,

Last night, I had yet another writer's block. *sigh* "I don't know what to blog about", I whined to McChef. Ever the helpful man that he is, he gave me the title for this very post and told me to loosely base this post on his experience with one particular ex of his, whom he has dubbed Psycho Lady *cue soundtrack from the movie Psycho*.


We all can learn a thing or two from Psycho Lady. So here are steps on how to keep in touch with an ex:

Call your ex in the middle of the night and ask for telephone numbers of random mutual friends.


The idea behind it: He should be relaxing by now, so it should be a good time to catch up.

Oh, but beware!:
1) It's late, he's got better things to do than talk to you, such as sleep or play Wii or count the cracks in his wall. Whatever it is, your voice is the very last thing he wants to hear.
2) You best be calling those numbers you asked for, otherwise he'll see it as a desperate attempt to having a conversation.


Send the word across, please!

The idea behind it: You're relying on your friend's big mouth to send the word across to your ex. You're gonna be at a certain place at a certain time, so you're hoping that he'll make time to see you.


And your mutual friend can also relay to your ex just how miserable you've been ever since the two of you broke up. By doing so, you're hoping that your ex will sympathize with you and will always be there for you.

Oh, but beware!:
Your future plans could really work in your disadvantage as it could give him a headstart to run the other direction. "Oh, she's gonna be here tomorrow? Great, I'm booking the next flight out to Zimbabwe".

Also, he couldn't care less if you're miserable or not.


Don't wait for an invitation from him to tag along on outings.

The idea behind it: He never calls you out anymore. So YOU need to take actions, even if that means you need to keep inviting yourself to his outings.


How to pull it off: Call him to ask him his whereabouts, but keep your questions short, like, "Hey, where are you now?" Then you hang up. Don't tell him that you wanna meet up, otherwise he'll run away. You must show up in the next 15 minutes (for fear that he might leave the place and all your efforts to tag along will go to waste).

Oh, but beware!:
You could be in for a very boring time. When you barge into his plans uninvited, he will most likely try to bore you just out of spite, such as ignoring you, not talking to you, or taking forever to look at rings that ironically, isn't meant for you.


Play the "best friend" card with your ex and his new lady.

The idea behind it: You know that movie "My Best Friend's Wedding"? When you hear whispers that your ex has his eyes set on a new girl, you immediately jump back into his life - impose your presence as the person he goes to (regardless whether he needs your advice or not). But don't just stop at your ex. You should also make efforts to meet the new girl and get to know her too. Remember, knowledge is power!


Just like the character that Julia Roberts played in the movie, you use whatever info you have to tear them apart. To him, say something like: "are you sure about her?", "perhaps you shouldn't rush into this", "you don't sound like you're ready for a relationship", "I just don't wanna see you get hurt". To his new lady, say things like: "isn't it weird that you used to date his friend?", "he isn't very good in bed", "he ain't the serious type", "he tends to make girls confuse".

Oh, but beware!:
If you haven't been close to him for a long time, take into serious consideration that he ain't the same guy you used to date. So only use this tactic if you know the history between your ex and his new girl. If they have been very good friends for a number of years, chances are whatever you say won't change the way they feel about each other. It's even worst if they both know what you've been saying behind their backs.


Sending mix messages.

The idea behind it: Use this tactic when there are news of your ex hooking up with a new girl (or in the midst of hooking up). This tactic won't work if you don't do it at the early stages of their relationship.


You send him cards and letters containing "mix" messages, like "I wish you were here to cuddle with me", or "I think about you all the time", or "Remember when...", or "That one day spent with you was the best trip so far" (even if you only did see him for like half an hour WITH a dozen other friends in the pub AND he hardly said a word to you). Point is, you MUST make him remember the "special bond" that you guys share (even if it is only in your head).

Oh, but beware!:
You can't play the denial game should the new lady finds out about this. You can't go, "Oh, I never wrote those letters", or "I don't remember ever writing such things" coz those letters are hard evidence. It can and will be used against you, especially when it has the postage date clearly stamped on it. If the new lady is smart, (and trust me, she is), she'll keep those letters as evidence, proof that your intentions aren't as pure as you portray it to be ("oh I was already with someone else at that time, so why would I want your man?", or "what's wrong with being friends with the ex?"). Well, if you are with someone else, why send those letters in the first place right?

Ask yourself this question: Would you trust this woman to be friends with your man? I know I can't, regardless if my man has to muster the courage to not puke just by the sight of her. This is about her, AND her actions towards my man. What if she pretended to be drunk & tried to kiss him? Now you see my point?


Take drastic actions to get his attention.

The idea behind it: When all else fails, perhaps you should resort to drastic measures to get him. You could get drunk (or pretend to be) and scream out his name all night, hoping that your friends will call him and get him to calm you down, or you could go suicidal, drive into a tree, land yourself in the hospital and get someone to call him to visit you, or you could just "kidnap" the poor man.

How to pull off the "kidnapping" plot:
You call him to ask him out for drinks, assure him that you'll be bringing a friend along. Make sure you are the one driving. After you've picked him up, drop your friend off - ASAP (coz time together is precious). Then you bring him back to your house and lock the doors. That's when you should hug him tightly (latch yourself onto him if you have to), and in a soft, crying voice you tell him,"My mom won't be home and I don't want to be alone tonight. I want you to cuddle with me and keep me warm".


Oh, but beware!: If he doesn't immediately jump at your idea, chances are you're off his to-do list. The thought of being nekkid with you (again) is so repulsive that he would rather eat glass than take his "buddy" out for a pleasurable ride. And that should be a very clear indicator that he's no more interested in you and that you've just been shown out the door.


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Sep 20, 2007

The Bridget Jones in My Head

Scribbled by Perky | Chucked away in

"I don't know why he's with her... she's just so.. ugly... and urgh... fat." Sounds familiar? Or how about this one: "I can't believe he left me for that walking lollipop". As a woman going through heartache, it's so easy to say nasty things like that. I, too, was one of those women who'd say those hurtful things when I was nursing my broken heart. I'd say things like "She's fat and cross-eyed" just to convince myself that he'd be miserable with her and therefore missing out on better things with me. It has never occurred to me that perhaps one day I could be on the receiving end of such nasty remark.

Last Monday when I was back home, McChef and I went jalan-jalan as it was my last day there. We decided to go to the Tun Jugah mall, where btw one of his ex was working as a jewellery assistant. I'm actually okay with meeting his exes (my kitty claws are retracted for as long as they don't try to be 'funny'). I don't get intimidated easily, so to speak lah! But this particular ex, just by the mention of her name can evoke emotions that I'm not very proud of... insecurities, paranoia, JEALOUSY, just to name a few.

This ex, *Bulat (a referrence to her erm... nice, well-endowed posterior) is of mix-parentage. And damn, has she got the best of both worlds. Blessed with sharp features and beautiful skin color, she could've easily redefine the meaning of 'exotic beauty'. A real head turner, that's what she is. And on top of what lies on the outside, she's beautiful on the inside too. At least, from what I heard from McChef. *Bulat is the ONLY ex he speaks of ever so fondly. It's like as if she doesn't have a bad bone cell in her.

How would you feel if your partner's ex has a bum like Eva?

So when McChef suggested we go buy new hairclips for me, I knew that she and I would officially meet. And almost immediately I felt this sickening twist at the bottom of my stomach. Not to mention, I felt like I was this frumpy old lady - no makeup, t-shirt and bermuda shorts and to top it all off, I was wearing McChef's slippers!! (who btw has much bigger feet than me!).


"Oh why... WHYYY can't I wear something more sexy today... something more girlfriend-like? Now I look like Ronald McDonald on a good day nonetheless!"

So shoot me for feeling like as if I'm about to get hit by a meteorite.

Perky: Babe, I don't know if I'm up to this.... I feel so out of place... some more I look so ordinary... no make up on... and look at what I'm wearing. I look so.. so... AUNTIE!!

And McChef's reply to that really put a smile on face (if not did wonders for my self-confidence):
So?? It should be her who should feel bad. "If only I had spent less time putting on make-up and getting all dressed-up, maybe McChef wouldn't have left me". Besides I don't like you under all that make-up and wearing so sexily. Other guys will look at you and I don't like that coz you're all mine.

Yeah I know... AwwwWwwwWww. Anyways, our meeting went pretty well, I must say. She's actually a cool girl (just like how McChef described her). Did I get jealous, you ask? Oh hell yeah - I am woman afterall. But I figured, for as long as she keeps her hands off my man, she and I will get along just fine.


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