Jun 16, 2008

The One That Got Away

Scribbled by Perky |

As we go through life, we'll meet lots of people and make mental notes of them. We'll always remember the ones with whom we shared special memories with (like the time when one of the gfs got stung by a jellyfish and how we all volunteered to piss on her to ease her pain - all in the name of friendship), or the one you first kissed, or the one you first loved, or the one you who always made you feel better.

But most of all, somehow or rather, we'll always remember the one that got away. Maybe we don't think about that person every single waking moment of every single day, but the thought of that person does pop up once in a while.

I think that the one that got away is someone who was very special to you, someone very close to your heart and everything was fantastic. Except the timing was just off. It was like as if you found this diamond in the rough, so to speak, but the stars or the planet wasn't lined up quite right in your universe.


I have that guy, the one that got away. He was the first guy I actually felt something real for. I met my one-that-got-away when I was in college. We didn't exactly start off great, but the dynamics of our friendship shifted at a pace I was comfortable with. Not too fast, not too slow. As time went by, I found myself making more mental notes of this guy - his sense of humor, the way he talked, the way he moved, how out of tune his singing was (which made me laugh even harder), how he doesn't take himself seriously, how he treated others, and how he was when he was with me.


Despite all those greatness, things didn't work out between us (well, obviously, since he is the one that got away). I suppose it was the timing of it all. Perhaps I was too slow in figuring out how my feelings were towards him. I had a lot of things going on at that point in time - I was away from home the first time, I broke up (again) with my high school bf, I was trying to adjust to the college life, etc.


A part of me wanted to just be swept away by his sweet gesture but a part of me was trying to keep things simple between us, well, simple for me at least. Yes, I wasn't ready for another relationship and it showed through the mix signals I was sending him.

Then one fine day he told me he's got someone new. I was overwhelmed with this sudden pain in my chest and how I tried really, really, really hard not to cry. And that was when I knew, how hard I had fallen for this guy and how things were never going to be the same between us.


It was quite strange because we never argued, never had misunderstandings, the chemistry between us was more than effing great but we both pulled away from each other because it was too much to deal with. He had a gf to attend to, while I had a broken heart to mend.

As time went by, after countless pity-me parties with the girls, after countless bad decisions in the guys I would date after my one-that-got-away, my heart finally healed itself. And one day I found myself ready.

Ready to settle down, ready to stick with my man through thick and thin. My current relationship, I believe, will be the one who I'll spend the rest of my life with. It'll work this time because I've finally made sense of things and I'm a different person now. I finally understand who I am, what I want and what I need from a partner.

But sometimes I do think about the one that got away. I wonder,"What if we were together now, with me as I am and not as I was?" Would it have worked? Would I be happier than I am now?


The one that got away is the biggest "what if?" question you'll have in your life. But considering the situation that I'm in (one foot down the wedding aisle with McChef), I'll just have to accept that my one-that-got-away is married to someone else and that he really is, well, the one that got away.
But thankfully, being the person that I am today, I've also realized that me wondering about the "what if's" is just a test of my commitment to McChef and I'll just shrug it off. But it's always nice to know that the memories I had with my one-that-got-away will most likely bring a smile to my face when I'm no longer "hip and happening".


Anyways, the real point that I'm trying to put across here is, if you have that person and it's not too late to act on it (such as you're both single), then seriously, do something about it. Ask him/her on a date, because who knows, you could very well be the person who got away for him/her. And who knows, now that the stars and the planets have lined themselves perfectly in both your universe, wouldn't it be great to be able to say to him/her, "Hey you, you're the one that almost got away".


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10 Your say:

budleee said...

*sigh

hmmm

*sigh some more

there is nothing we can do right if that person is not met for us.. we tried all our best, tapi it was just not ment to be.

*sigh even more

*sigh....

**trying to forget pass relationships..

The Banker said...

that's a sad story. but then again, i'm sure mcchef is making u happy. if not, you wouldn't be putting any foot down the aisle with him wouldcha? cherish the past yet look to the future!

Anonymous said...

yeah, it does pops up in your mind once in awhile. had a relationship with a girl while i was engaged and she also has a steady bf during the time. we met during a wedding. things were so easy in between us but then the distance played a significant role, well, the stars didn't aligned. when my daughter was born, she emailed me, saying that they have the same birth date. now she's engaged to her then bf. come to think of it, the planets will align to the right one anyway, but then, it has always been a strange universe.

Nick Phillips said...

I think we've all had someone that got away. It can be a blessing in disguise cos we sometimes maybe they were meant to get away so we can meet the love of our lives later on. I've had lots of ones that got away but I'm glad to say that I've found the one that I will never let get away from me now :D

Aziya said...

People say we will never forget our "first love"..... It's been "written" neatly in our memories... it makes us learn the mistakes we made and proceed the next love with lot's of consideration and passion (if we broke-up on the first love).

The good thing about you two is.. you both very seldom gotten into quarrelsome. But in the end, God choose another person to be your loved ones.

I pray for your happiness always.. and I wish I could be like you having a guy to loves you very much.

lyana said...

mmmmmmmmmmmm.

I have accepted the fact that me and my 'mr big' won't be together- like you mentioned once before during one of our duduk sessions- there's no use hanging on to someone who don't love you back. And hey, I'm healed now- just that there're too many other commitments in my life right now that it's hard to really focus on anything, what more to find 'mr right'. So I guess, in my opinion- I have learnt to cherish the happy times that me and my 'mr-big/theonewhodefinitelygotaway' , even the last lunch we had before I came here- and just remembered him making me feel happy. I have learnt to ignore how heartbroken I was for him not loving me back, or the fact that after 5 years, during that lunch mere days before I were to leave the country, he finally told me that there was someone else.

So yes, sometimes, it's best to just remember the good times and not how we felt about that person. And hey, you never know, this old witch might just find someone who will love her back, hey? :)

::airswift:: said...

we plan but He up there knows better.
that friend went away, and you met McChef.
that's not bad at all. ^_^

Anonymous said...

Heyya perks... I was deeply touched by this one. It's been awhile since you posted something that hits me with that nostalgic feeling. That's why I love your writing so much :)

But considering the history between you and mcchef (the meddling ex-gf and how hard you tried to just be friends yadayada)come to think of it, to him you were the one that almost got away. Don't you think so? ;)

xoxo,
Tan.

Ratu Syura said...

the one that got away. *sigh*

i'd go crazy if i asked myself all the 'what ifs'. but now im just glad that he did get away cuz i might have never met my love i have now. :)

btw, came over from nick's.. i love your writing! will definitely be back soon.. :)

Perky said...

Budleee:
Hmm... I don't think you should forget about past relationships bcoz they help form who you are today. You may not realize it now but 1 day you'll look back n you'll realize how much you've learn & grown since then :)

The Banker:
Hehehe... he's making me more than happy :)

Nick Phillips:
Hahaha. Yeah i'm sure you won't let the missus get away from you now, you happily married man you ;)

Aziya:
Oh tq very much darling. That's so sweet of you :))

Lyana:
Yeah I remember that conversation we had.... Continue the positive thinking n 1 day your prince charming will come sweep you off your feet, sistah! :) (i sound like a fortune cookie now *sigh*)

Airswift:
Yeap, that's not bad at all! ;)

Tan:
Hmm... you're quite smart lah you! I never saw it that way. Hehehe ;)

Ratu Syura:
Yeap we girls sure had to kiss a lot of frogs (so to speak) b4 we found that special someone ;) It's a blessing in disguise.

And thanks for dropping by, hun!