Jan 21, 2009

Still Got the Blues For You?

Scribbled by Perky |

2009 is proving to be the year of weddings. I've got 6 weddings to attend from February to March. I'm more concerned about what I'll be wearing to each weddings coz I ain't gonna get caught wearing the same thing twice!





Anyways, here's a quiz for you guys.

If an ex-bf or an ex-fling or an ex-whatever-you-call-someone-who-used-to-be-important-to-you-but-not-so-much-anymore, invited you to attend their wedding, would you go?

I can pretty much guess the kind of responses I'll be getting.

So I'm going to narrow down the question a little bit further. Would you go if he was the guy-who-got-away? The one who once in a while still pops into your mind and makes you wonder,"Hmm... what if we had stayed together?"

I'm in a dilemma. Don't get me wrong. I'm more than happy that he's getting married. There was no bitterness when we ended. Though I'm not in love with him anymore, I still love him, get what I mean? But I'm not sure if I'm brave enough to go.

Just getting his invitation card gave me an emotional roller-coaster, so I can't imagine that it'll be any easier for me to watch him say his I-do's with another woman. And I'd really hate to be that girl who looks at the groom with those sad nostalgic eyes.




So should I or should I not go?

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24 Your say:

Sam said...

They say if you loved him enough, you would let him go - and let him be happy. Cliched, I know...

But even so, I would probably feel the same emotional roller-coaster ride you did - I guess it'll probably feel like all the memories coming back, wishing that they had expanded more into my life as I know it instead of losing it all at some point.

But hey, loving is to be happy for them right? If you love him, go to the wedding and be happy for him. :)

*Anton* said...

Sorrie o Sammie, have to disagree with you on this.

Be happy for him, but please do not go as you are obviously uncomfy....so why torture yourself? Juz call him and wish him well ....... and go spend the night skinny-dipping with the current man of your dreams instead *winks*

+Ant+

savante said...

Go to the wedding. He meant something to you - and obviously he still thinks of you enough to send an invite. Though it will sting a little, say your goodbyes :)

shay said...

go. for closure.

Samantha aka Wen said...

I agree with Savante. You should definitely go.

glad I can finally read your blog again :D

Nick Phillips said...

I'm anti-social so I guess I wouldn't go ... LOL! Besides, I don't want to end up pitying the bum for marrying her .... hahahahaha ...

cromely said...

If things didn't end too badly, I would go. Probably. There's a complicated formula to be crafted of course. It should involved things like:

Was it a sad or angry breakup?
How is your relationship with the ex's soon to be spouse? Was that person the reason the relationship ended?
How long ago was it?
Are other friends attending or is it likely to be a lonely event?
How attractive are members of the wedding party (in case it's a lonely event)?
Is there an open bar?
Is it the good stuff?
Are you likely to make a scene and embarrass the married couple?
Would that be a bad thing?

So I guess the real answer is maybe.

MiChi said...

i think you should go... who knows you can find someone much better during the wedding? muahahaha...

Wear so pretty until people thought that you are the bride, then he may regret for not marrying you..... kekek....so evil of me

lyana said...

hmmm. If it was me, I would probably not go- cause I'm a very very bad actor. :) as in, I would be happy if my 'Mr Big' were to get married, but there were so many complicated emotions that we went through that I might..cry?...at his wedding. But that's just me.

However, if you feel as if you can be composed..then go. He invited you anyway, which means that he'd like for you to be there as an old friend and he still cherishes your friendship. :)

JD Cole said...

go if u're a drama queen....who knows the man might look u at the eyes and calls the wedding off!!

ok that's scandalous!!

i dunno which advise to give for if i were caught in a similar situation, i'd post it at my blog to find the answer too ;)

just follow ur heart my dear

Ron Jerem Lee said...

go , dont be chicken. prove that you are brave. walk up to the man say "good for you, she's pretty" , walk to the bitch and say "watch out, he's got crab".

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greatbloggingtips said...

I'm going for sure.
If you're happy for him, let him know it :)

apples said...

Oh sweetie... I can't believe I'm already old enough to say "I know what you mean... I wish I knew what happened to my "the one who got away, but would I go to his wedding? ...

... I don't think I could. Of course, it depends on how things are between you two. If you still love the guy now, chances are you always will.

Then... I firmly believe in that old saying "It's better to regret something you did, than something you didn't do." If you don't go, you can never take it back. Whether you go or not, it probably won't change how you feel about him...

You'll always survive the wedding... But can you live with yourself through a lifetime of what-ifs?

Basically what I'm saying is I HAVE NO IDEA! Sorry :)

Anonymous said...

hi..happy new year. it's been awhile since i last leave a comment here.

anyway, about the "whatever-you-call-it" thing, i do not have an answer for you. in my case, i didn't go and i'm still not sure if i did the right thing.

Anonymous said...

I am always interested in women, i don't even wanna think of being a gay and going to my ef-bf's wedding damn it. And also it is a sin to love the same gender. No way perky.

Perky said...

Anonymous:
I really don't get what you're trying to say here.

Are you a straight man? Or are you assuming that I'm gay? Coz if you do, you should look at my blog header (that's me on the box, clearly not a gay man).

Anyways, there are bigger sins than loving ppl of the same gender, such as cheating on your spouse.

mlle linie said...

perky, i guess if its to me, it depends on who the spouse is. if the spouse never knew me before and ive broken up with him a long time ago, i think it's probably OK, considering if he is still a good friend to me.

if he's marrying my friend, i'd say no. because it would look extremely awkward.

Anonymous said...

Perky, you say that ihave a quiz for you guys (why only to the guys?) And u mention about the ex-bf of you guys, so what i mean is that as a guy i don't have any ex-bf's so there will be no such wedding so no need to go to the wedding which does not exist. My point of view. Though my words are clear , :P we do not communicate on the same layer. Lol lol

Anonymous said...

Yes cheating on your spouse is also a big sin. But what you ask is about ex-bf's marriage and u ask it to the guys in a funny way :)))

budleee said...

anonymous is giler..

Perky said...

Ah... I finally get what anonymous is telling me. He assumed that when I said "guys" he thought I literally meant "men".

Sorry, my bad. Sometimes gender can be so blur to me that even when I talk to my girls, I'd go "hey man, what's up?" ;)

Twilight Zone said...

I would never attend. Just like Chinese believe that a horse won't eat the grass behind. We just let go and move forward to greener pastures with positive and happier feelings. Send him a flower bouquet with sharp thorns. LOL...

Perky said...

Haiyoh... nasib baik I'm not your ex-gf. If not, free free jer dapat flower with sharp torns. lol! ;P