Nov 22, 2006

A Line Must Be Drawn Here

Scribbled by Perky |

Dear Mr. Avid Reader,

It has come to my attention that your attempt to establish a post-relationship friendship with me has gotten to a point where a line must be drawn. I do get it that you want to try and be friends again, but I believe you are trying too hard at my expense.

Trying to be on a huggy-touchy basis with me is a huge no-no. HUGE. I dumped you for many reasons and the way I left you was cruel, I do admit. If you have some self-respect, I would be the last person you should want to touch or be on a 'very-friendly' basis ever again. I'm sure it would be a cool story for you to tell your friends on how great it is that you are able to maintain a very good friendship with your ex - but please take note, all that is in your head. Having that kind of friendship with me is your dream and it will remain that way.

Please read the following guidelines on how we can be friends:
  1. Going by first-name basis, which means no petnames, no 'sweetie', no 'darling', no 'honey', no 'sugar', etc etc etc. When our relationship ended, so did this priviledge. Unless if gaynism is your new religion, you should only call me by my given name.
  2. No means no. So if you're asking for favors/help and I said no, please don't ask again. Asking again would resort in me wanting to take a fork and stab it in your eyes. Repeatedly. It's annoying. But if you must need a reason why I refuse to help you, well, it's because helping you would require me to be in constant contact with you. And that thought alone makes me cringe.
  3. No calling at odd hours. No calling me first thing in the morning as that is the time darling and I 'bond'. No calling me after 11pm as your voice is the last thing I want to hear before I sleep. No calling during lunch hour. And calls should be limited to one minute. No matter how urgent the call is, or even if it's a life-and-death situation, NO CALLING AT ODD HOURS. Period.
  4. Do not think you know me best. You only know that part of me that I let you see. All that sweet talk, all that caring, well, it's all part of me doing my duty as your girlfriend. In other words, it was an obligation on my part. So don't go around saying how I prefer my food that way, or how I have 12 different laughs. It's ridiculous 'cause you sound like the only thing you do is watch soap TV all day.
  5. Content censorship. Please refrain yourself from texting me whenever you miss me. I do not care how you're feeling and can't be bothered to know as well. Can you imagine the trouble you would put me into if my boyfriend read those messages? I will have to explain to him that nothing is going on and will most likely spend days trying to assure him that he is the only one for me.
  6. Stop bringing up the past. If you think that our relationship was great, then keep those memories for I have no recollection of having 'the best relationship I ever had' with you. You caused me so much drama, so much stress... So really, I don't know what led you to thinking that you were the best guy I've ever had. Dude, you really should learn to let go of the past.
  7. I am NOT your relationship counselor. Again, I have to say, I can't be bothered who you're dating, who you're doing, who broke your heart, etc etc. I don't care if your broken heart makes you suicidal. You were suicidal when I left you, but did I care? Was I ever at your side when you landed yourself in the hospital? So what makes you think that I would care about your problems with other girls?
  8. I don't want any titles you bestow on me. Please remove all the following the next time you talk about me: 'the love of my life', 'the one I'll always love til I die', 'my true love', 'my first real love', 'the one I'll always have a soft spot for', 'the one I'd do anything for'. If you must bestow a title to me, I should let you know that I only accept "Your Highness".

Friendship is a two-way thing. You don't see me running to you when I have problems, do you? I assumed that when I didn't return your messages, you would get the point. But clearly, you must've seen my silence as conscent. I had assumed and that was my mistake. I am sorry if I had misled you into thinking that we can be 'exs-who-are-more-than-just-friends-but-not-a-couple-again'.

If you want to be my friend, I ask that you respect my wishes as stated above. Being 'just friends' with you is at the bottom of my to-do list compared to working out my relationship with my CURRENT partner. Should you violate the above guidelines, I will assume that you do not respect me as a friend, needless to say you do not respect my relationship with my new man. Therefore, I shall assume that you are a threat and that you will put my relationship in jeopardy, thus I will not hesitate to cut ALL ties with you.

Now that you have read my side of the story, I hope you will rethink the kind of friendship you want to have with me. Do you still want to be 'buddy-buddy' friends with me? You are my ex but of course, we can still be friends... Only if a line is drawn.

Thank you.

Yours truly,
Deeply Regrets Ever Hooking Up With You

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16 Your say:

Anonymous said...

Few things are more annoying than guys who don't know when to quit..

But in my experience, giving them attention only makes them believe you want them. No doesn't mean no to a desperate guy - no matter how many times you say it.

::airswift:: said...

shame on that guy. yeah, if he still cannot get it, you will have to break ties on him. time to terminate dysfunctional friendships!

Anonymous said...

Aiyoyo... Banyak geram.

Splash him a glass of water in public and that'll do.

Good luck!

Anonymous said...

all I ever wanted from you was to be friends again. instead you decide to be CHILDISH and write bout this on your blog.

one - don't you think that me trying to be friends again show that i've moved on? I'm willing to put aside tat you dump me by passing the msg tru your friend. Don't that show that I've got bigger character than you?!?

two - is it wrong for me to call you sweet names? i could call you names like bitch you want or ont? of cos not right?!?

three - if your bf feels threatened by me then that shows his an insecure guy. then he is not good enough for you.

four - i tell you those things so that we can establish a better friendship. afterall, odn't friends tell each other things like this?

five - you must be so full of yourself if you think that i'm not over you. there's nothing wrong with saying good memories. but it also don't mean tat i want to hook up with you again.

avid reader.

xavier said...

did i hear "ouch!" just now, i am sure i heard someone yelled that hmmm...

dont care la huh, stay fahbulous darling =p

savante said...

Ouch. Breakups.

mama diva said...

perky, u rock girl!!!!
- i think that the statement by that so "anonymous", that he got bigger cahracter is so dull... what kinf of fren would ever say that he got bigger character than u...for me, i dont mind people call me bitch after all, it's better than darling or sweetie...who cares!threatened?for sure u will feel the same too if u are in his shoe,anyway he might think that u r even more childish...there is a line between fren...some secrets remain as secret!be sure of that...close fren only enjoy and share such things, and that only if they are invited...saying good memories sometimes just suck...who want to remeber about them if they might make u feel hurt... different people got diffrernt style n personality, so get along with their style n u can be their fren ok mr anonymous...

again, mak support u perky!!

Anonymous said...

oh gosh. this avid reader is such a sucky sore loser.

how can he even judge that your bf is not a good bf? he is one of the nicest responsible and caring bf i have ever known.

and yeah, avid reader, it's WRONG for you to call perky sweet names. are you gay or don't u just get it?

beyond stupidity.

-perky's supporter

Anonymous said...

avid reader;

like.. hello??? perky had just said:


so i dont think she have even the slightest sweet memory with you. you are the only perasan one.

-perky's supporter

Anonymous said...

i think mr avid has hots for guys.

A.V.I.D = a very irritating drag.

-ratu kebaya 2003

Anonymous said...

dear avid reader..


-another perky supporter

Perky said...

Lol! Thanks for all the love & support! =)

To my 'sistahs', damn girls! Remind me not to have catfights with you! Hehehehe.

bigfatwitch said...

wow... i leave the country for a week and all hell breaks loose...

Dear Mr. Avid Reader,

1 - If you really do have a bigger character, you wouldn't even be replying to this blog. Why? Because NO ONE knows (or rather, no one gives a shit) who you are. She didn't name you. You had nothing to lose. But now you've made a nuisance of yourself. Can you spell IDIOT?

2 - Yes, it's wrong. It shows you have absolutely no respect for Perky and her current beau. And "bitch" isn't the only other name besides those sickening nicknames you gave her. Is your knowledge of the English language THAT limited?

3 - So if a guy points a gun in your face, you feel threatened because you're insecure la? Not because the gun could harm you la? So clever! I wonder why other ppl don't see it that way. We must all be stupid.

4 - Orang tak peduli means orang tak peduli la. Go tell your sob stories to Oprah. But then again, she wouldn't give a shit anyway. The rest of the world is far more interesting than you.

5 - You're the one who's so full of yourself. Calling yourself the bigger character, saying you're over Perky and yet still getting your panties in a twist just because she wrote a blog about you (btw, you've had it coming for a while). You're OBVIOUSLY not over her if you're still treating her the way you treated her when you were together.

6 - Seek professional help. You're highly delusional and in need of a life.

Perky said...

Big Fat Witch:
Well said... *sniff sniff* I'm so proud of having a laser-mouth as my sister! Lol!!

Anonymous said...

Loser!!! Huahuaha.. Perky, which dumpster did you pick him up from?

Perky said...

From the land of grass and weed. Gee I should've taken a hint from there huh?