Apr 6, 2007

Farting My Way To A Fiancee

Scribbled by Perky |

I really have to learn to watch what I say around McChef. Or more like resist the temptations to simply blurt things out even though it was suppose to be just a tease. Our exchange of SMSes went something like this:

McChef: Baby im going 2 sleep now. Too tired. Mmuah luv u. I cant wait 2 b married 2 u. So when r u going 2 propose 2 me?

Perky: (simply couldn't resist the temptation to tease him silly) Luv u 2 babe. I tot of proposing 2 u 2moro but since ur not coming nvrmind lah. Some other day la hoh ;)

And guess what, he really did came the next day! I knew I couldn't possibly wriggle myself out of popping the question to him first (the bastard, he came up with a way to get ME to propose to him).

I think he's too chicken sh*t to pop the question. I mean, the dude bought the ring already, and he told me bout the ring, so why not pop the damn question man?

We got home, and he was so adamant on getting a proposal out of me. Personally, I'm fine with me popping the 'M' word first. But the damn sneak tricked me into doing it. It's a different story if he asked me something like,"Hey, would you like to propose to me instead? I think it's so romantic if you ask. Some more you hardly ever do anything romantic for me".

It's kinda true, you know, about me being the unromantic one. I'm certainly the kinky, corny one, and not to mention the attention whore of the relationship. McChef would be the one doing all the fancy romantic moves (ooh, which reminds me of the candle light dinner he made me when I went over last month, but I'll tell you guys bout that some other time).

I was put on the spot. I didn't rehearse how I was going to propose to him. I haven't even got him a ring yet. I was just going to wing it. Yeah, the most important question I'll ever ask a guy and there I was, plucking movie lines from the air.

I must've been so traumatized from being put on the spot that I really don't remember how I popped the question in the end. I mean, I already know he's going to say "yes" so it shouldn't matter how I asked him right?

Ekkk! Wrong! His reply was,"Hmm.. okay, I'll think about it".

He'll think about it? He'll think about it?!? ARRrrggGGGGGHhhhHHHHHH! That's just mean. Putting me through all that stress and still not give me a definitive answer.. that's just cruel, man.

See, the thing with me when put under enormous stress is that my body tends to store gas. Most of the time I'm able to just burp it out. But sometimes the stress is just too much that it ends up in my ass. It'll stay there for a while, making me uncomfortable til I find a way to relax myself. If I'm able to do that within the hour, I can let out a silent fart... the non-embarassing kind.... the kind that won't make people cockstare at you... the kind that's almost like a gentle breeze....

But that Sunday, I just couldn't relax. I tried. I really tried, you know. Do you know how hard it is to be humped on with your ass filled up with gas?!? I don't recommend any of you to try it.

Anyways, I had been giggling the whole day already. That's pretty normal whenever he's around. Then came evening. We were just lying down, enjoying each other's company, telling jokes (where I'm the joke, and he just laughs at me). But he said something to me that was so funny that I laughed my ass off. Literally. It was then and there that I let it out.. a very loud POOOOOOOOOTTTTT!!

I can't believe I just did that. Arrrrgghhhh I was so embarassed!!

He just looked at me with total disbelief. And then he laughed. He laughed in my face. And he laughed really hard.

Perky: (Trying to cover malu) I'm so sorry. I...I... I don't know how that happened. I... I... I... I've been so gassy this whole day. (eng trans for malu: embarassed)

McChef: Yay! I finally get to hear you fart.

Perky: Huh? So?

McChef: You're human afterall. I was beginning to think I was dating an alien. YESSSS!

Perky: Yes to what?

McChef: Yes to your marriage proposal.

And basically that's the story of how my farting got me engaged. This will definitely be a good story to tell when we have our wedding reception one day. Yeap, the fart that won his heart.

Oh and one tiny thing, he came all the way here to see me but forgot to bring the damn ring. I'll let it slide for now as he did catch the early morning flight and he did get me my life insurance.

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9 Your say:

savante said...

Awwww... I just knew it was the fart that would do it! :) Congrats.

alex said...

the kind that's almost like a gentle breeze....

u know u always did hav a way of describing things. LMAO!!!


EarlGreyTea said...

haha, just so funny and romantic in its own way!


Perky said...

Hehehe.. thanks! =) Yeap, it was the fart that sealed the deal.

Well that's the best I can describe it. What do u expect? I'm not exactly the literature kind u know! :P

Earl grey tea:
well we're not exactly your average couple. we can be such dorks at times lol!

::airswift:: said...

haha.. so cute and funny the stories of u and your boiboi.

happy that you are happy darling.

jules said...

did you perhaps think of telling your sister that you got engaged? No, i didn't think so =p

Call me la!

Anonymous said...

CONGRATS!! it's fartingly hilarious and romantic at the same time.


Anonymous said...

You guys are like the cutest couple ever!! Am so filled with envy. Why cant I ever find a McChef too?!?

Congrats once again babes! :))))))


Perky said...

Haha. Not so cute when it was happening though. After giving it some thoughts, yeah, it is funny coz the jokes are on me. Lol!!

Call you?!? Haiyor so expensive you know international call! Some more I won't know when to call you... who knows you're out DRINKING :P Oh well, now you know =)

Yeah, who would've thought I'd have the romantic streak going on. Lol! Thanks.

The secret is to plant the 'love' seed when you guys are still teenagers. Keep the supportive I-Got-Your-Back friendship thingy going & in a few years time, BOOM! You guys are in love. Fate has nothing to do with it. It's you. YOU need to take action.

Then again, you're so old lah Tan. You missed the opportuned moment YEARSSSSSSS ago!

this is what you get for cancelling our margarita session bitch! *evil laugh * thunder thunder*