Nov 18, 2005

The Sweet Joys of Booze

Scribbled by Perky |

Due to recent events, I am forced to admit (again, and many many times again) that I have a drinking problem. No, I am not an alcoholic (though that would make a more interesting read). It's just that I can't hold my liquor. People say that the more you drink, the better the body gets at absorbing alcohol. Now that's just a load of rubbish coz I sure as hell still can't hold my drink after all these years. I had actually given up the drinking habit (read post here) but somehow, perhaps due to temptation and my nature of being up-to-no-good, I've picked it up again. Perhaps by writing this post will make me realize that I really should stop drinking and make it a reminder of what a lousy drunk I am.

Sleepy Drunk
The state of being sleepy drunk is good as I am not a danger to myself or to anyone. It cures insomnia. This is usually achieved after drinking a glass of wine. Wine is good. It doesn't make you puke, nor will it give you crazy hangovers. I remember the first time I tasted wine. It was my 18th birthday and my dad brought me to this really nice fancy restaurant. My dad loves wine. My mom is against all this liquor stuff, so he hides them all over the house (I know where they are!!). Anyway, he said that now that I was of legal age, he thought it would be nice for me to have my first wine (perhaps he wants a wine-drinking buddy, who knows). So the wine came and he showed me how to taste wine, you know, how to stir your glass, sniff it, sip it, etc. So I imitated him, sipped my wine and wow! I just loved it. Loved it so much I drank the whole glass like as if it were tequilla shots. Then I asked the waiter to pour me another glass... then another... Of course, now I know that wine is meant to be drank slowly, like reaaallllyyyy slow. Anyway, that night on my 18th birthday nonetheless, I had gotten drunk (to the point of dozing off) in front of my dad in some fancy restaurant where he had to carry me home. Though it would make my dad sound like a responsible man by saying that that was the last time he asked me to drink with him, but he's pretty cool for an old man. Of course I only limit myself to just one glass when he's around (and another when he's not looking).

Happy Drunk
Happy drunk is a state of bliss, where one glass is simply not enough. Happy drunk is usually achieved in a bar or pub (usually during happy hours because that's when the beers are cheap), where you pretty much just hang out with friends and watch something on tv (football, for instance). Or when your girlfriends just need a drink to get over some moron she's been dating. Back in my uni days, my girlfriends and I would frequent TGI Friday's for margaritas (they have the best margaritas in town!). Those were the good old days because we'd just sit at our usual booth, with a glass of margarita and plenty of gossip to go around. Happy drunk is good because even though you've lost control over your tongue (you just talk a bit more and a little bit louder than usual), you still have control over your body (no dirty dancing, no tabletop dancing, no tripping over some invisible chair). Happy drunk is usually followed by large amounts of thunderous laughter. And when it's time to go home, everyone will leave the pub happy, though with a somewhat bearable hangover the next day when they wake up. Though I seldom find myself remembering what I've said the night before, I'm glad that I said it out. And who ever said that booze doesn't solve your problems? Blargh!

Pissed Drunk
Bar dancing... something I'm too familiar withPissed drunk is achieved when you start to lose count of what you've had, and even though you know you've lost count, you still keep drinking. The way I see it, when I don't know how much I've had, I usually reset the counter back to one. The symptoms of being pissed drunk (at least for me) is that I don't feel my legs anymore. It's dangerous to be pissed drunk when there's loud music playing because the body just wants to dance. When the body works out, it gets dehydrated. And when you're already so drunk, you pretty much will drink anything you can get, even if that means drinking more liquor, which will subsequently cause your body to become even more dehydrated and you pick up another drink... oh it's a vicious circle! It's fun to be pissed drunk once in a while but for me being pissed drunk is bad news. I tend to experience blackouts. I remember the first time someone brought up the issue of me passing out. It was New Year's night and I was out partying hard with my girlfriends. After a good round of hard drinking and dancing, we crashed at Lisa's. I remember walking into her room and I remember taking a shower. What happened in between I had no idea. But according to Mel, I was heading for the bed when I suddenly passed out and just dropped to the floor. A few minutes later I got up and got into the shower. The bruise I remember, of course. It's so friggin obvious on my head. That's the danger of passing out. Your mind tends to create its own memory in its attempt to fill in the blanks. Of course, the way I remember it, I got the bruise from butt-heading a guy while dancing. Sadly to say, that was not the last time I had passed out and created my own memories. Well, at least my 'memories' are much more bearable to listen to compared to the way my friends remember it. Oh well...

Even the pumpkin looks better than me when I'm wasted!This is the stage I hate the most, but thankfully to good friends who've made it a point to watch (and control) the amount of drinks I take, it's something I don't achieve very often. Wasted is when I've passed the point of no return: too much beer, too much vodka, too much tequila... just too much of everything. This is when my ugly side comes out of me. I'd puke out everything inside my body and then some. From stories I've heard about myself (real ugly stories too but something I need to hear to remind myself why I need to exercise control on my drinking ways), I have passed out in toilets, I've woken up in my own puke, slept over the toilet bowl or slept in the shower and woken up in the car. I used to not believe the stories they tell about me being wasted. That is until I had gotten wasted with my ex and I knew he meant every single word he said about how fucked up I was. Anyhoo, according to those who have seen my wasted stage, it's not the puking that they can't handle. It's me. In my wasted stage, I become very bitter and have been known to pick fights with practically anyone. I refuse to budge from my comfort place (which is usually the toilet bowl or the ice bucket). It's really painful to move when you're so wasted. You stomach burns, and it feels like as if someone's drilling many holes in your head. Luckily (or not) I don't remember what I'm like when I'm wasted. But I do remember the next day and that really really sucks. For the next 3 days I would experience nausea, sore throat and migraine, and wondering why the hell do I have so many bruises on my body.

So yeah, I think this post has helped remind me of why I really shouldn't drink a single drop of liquor.

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8 Your say:

vonne said...

Remember that time when we were at chinoz bangsar when alex just came back from perth & we all had waaaay to much vodka? Woman you were so piss drunk that when you got up you fell over your chair and landed on the couple behind us? Hee hee. Then you selambar badak got up and said with your nose stuck up 'where did that floor came from?i'm good people. no need to worry'. hahaha. that was a crazy nite.

Anonymous said...

Hahaha. I remember that one. The both of you were so wasted I didn't know which one to carry first. Hehehe. Tough being the only dick around 2 chicks.


queue said...

Gosh Perks! You are right. You can't hold ur drinks for nuts. I remember you singing Negaraku at the top of ur lungs at 4am once. thanks to the National drink of Malaysia, hmn.. good ol vodka. hey wait. that's russian. what ever. But u're so FUN when you're drunk! Porn and drinks anyone? I am sitting next to Perky, she might just live up to her name. ;)

Perky said...

Vonne & Alex:
Damn bitches. Nicely go bring up the chinoz story. That was a really fun nite though. Sitting down, talk cock, then when it was time to get up who else better than moi to embarass herself (again). hahaha. Man i remember us 3 dumbasses sleeping in alex's car. Me hogging the backseat, vonne in the front (luckily you didn't puke inside the car.. alex's leather seat and all...) and alex nicely snoring away. kah kah kah. and it was so stuffy in the car but like we care coz we were fuckin wasted! alex, u really shouldn't come back to m'sia darling ;)

This one also another biatch. Hehehe. It's MY blog damnit. Dun go making up stories!! Lol!! Oh man... i do not remember singing the national song, but i do remember we were playing that stupid card game & i was the one who kept drinking. Man i got so wasted that night.
And we are sooo not gonna have anymore of those porn & drinks ever! hahaha! *'Fuck my butt!!' echoes in head* As for living up to my name, i'm just gonna hav2 let everyone down. Hehehe... Perky chanting in the background "NO MORE BOOZE! NO MORE BOOZE!"

Roy said...

Lydd... if memoy served me right. arent u of a religion that is forbidden to drink liqour? i mean HARAM,i am only saying this coz ur jules elder sister n of the same blood line(confius lah i ni). anyway i'll love to know more about you, jules, ur lil bro etc. so keep up the bloging n let us see the real you. Oh ya... u said pist drunk... ever been "taken advantage over" when u were pissed drunk? any memories of that?

Jay said...

I love your "self-restraint", if you can really call it that.

Perky said...

I have this understanding with God that for as long as I have faith in Him, the other lil things I do shouldn't really matter to Him. For crying out loud, I've got tattoos on my body! If u wanna know the real me, then this is really not the place. When i blog, I write as my alter ego, Perky. Let's just say I'm writing a comic, where most of it is fiction or exaggerated, but it does have real life values in them.
As for being taken advantage of while under the influence, I'd have to say no. That's coz i'm always in good hands & frens make sure i am being taken care of all the time. =) so good to have good friends kan?

Yeap, if we can call it that! hahaha.

Himu said...

The worst I ever was drunk when the bartender refused to serve me any.. and afterwards when I was walking on the streets with my friends .. we were walking in zigzg in circles.. and wow that was weird.. hehe.. I woke up at uni :o wt? I have no recollection what happened that night.. hehe..